TOO MUCH TIME ON HIS HANDS

An Ohio prosecutor sought the death penalty for Punxsutawney Phil, saying the famous groundhog misled millions of people by predicting an early spring. “Punxsutawney Phil has let us down,” said Michael Gmoser. “I awoke this morning to a snowstorm, low temperatures, and howling wind.” Gmoser dropped the suit after Phil’s handlers took responsibility for the error.